The Fellowship of the Ring

Written by: JRR Tolkien

First line: When Mr. Bilbo Baggins of Bag End announced that he would shortly be celebrating his eleventy-first birthday, with a party of special magnificence, there was much talk and excitement in Hobbiton.

Why you should read this book: The story of an unassuming little halfling who leaves behind a life of comfort and ease when he inherits a weapon of mass destruction that is too powerful to even be handled by any creature with more gumption and ambition than a hobbit hits different when you are actually living in a world where a dark shadow is indeed crossing the land. Accompanied by his faithful gardener and two adventurous cousins, Frodo Baggins sets off on a very long ramble, to figure out what to do with this insidious artifact, is pursued by unspeakable terror, is aided by the forces of good, and eventually finds direction and companionship. Determined to undertake an impossible and suicidal quest for the benefit of his entire world, Frodo is the hero to inspire the least among us to strive to do great things in the face of great evil. 

Why you shouldn't read this book: You don't want to read one of the greatest stories ever told. 

Zarifa: A Woman's Battle in a Man's World

Written by: Zarifa Ghafari and Hanna Lucinda Smith

First line: The men wanted to know everything about Germany.

Why you should read this book: Educated and outspoken from a young age, in a time and place where girls were typically not allowed to be educated or speak in public at all, Ghafari gained fame and notoriety as the little girl who went on national television and demanded answers from the president of Afghanistan as to why her village had no roads and her school had no computers or English classes. Repeatedly blown up by the Taliban, defied by her family, and opposed by ignorant yahoos in her quest to finish school and reform her country, she never backed down regardless of how often people told her she couldn't do the thing she was already doing. Although the Taliban's capture of Kabul in 2021 effectively ended her political career and forced her to temporarily flee the country, she continues to fight for the rights of all Afghan people, and especially for the rights of girls and women to receive an education, to walk freely through their own streets, and to earn their own money.

Why you shouldn't read this book: Ghafari is tough, but she's not made of steel and her distress over the Taliban's murder of her father and their invasion of Kabul is palpable and heart-rending; this is a book about how you can fight your entire life, always do the right thing, and still be overwhelmed by evil. 

The Days Are Just Packed

Written by: Bill Watterson

First line: MOMMM

Why you should read this book: If you find yourself yearning for a simpler era, one in which the entire country was rallied around the philosophical musings of an impulsive six-year-old and his more mature but equally prone to chaos tiger companion, perhaps it's time to revisit the magical world of Calvin and Hobbes. This collection from the early '90s has it all: dissociative daydreams, rhyming verse, Calvin harassing his father, Calvin harassing his mother, Calvin harassing his teacher, and, of course, Calvin harassing the little girl next door. Just all around late twentieth century joy from a time where everyone consumed the same media and people felt OK about little children reading the news.

Why you shouldn't read this book: This work is not to be consumed by authoritarians. 

179 Degrees from Now: Four Stories from Just Past the Edge

Written by: Thomas Watson

First line: "She's too old for this imaginary friend nonsense," said George.

Why you should read this book: These four short stories hit that speculative space that sometimes leans toward fantasy and sometimes toward science, asking questions like "What if imaginary friends were real?" and "What if there was some direct connection between Charon on the River Styx and Henry David Thoreau on Walden Pond?" There's one about the multiverse and one that's sort of about a ghost, plus excerpts from two of the author's novels. Each story turns on a bit of a twist, the kind that is only available to writers of speculative fiction who know how to weave reality and imagination together on a single loom.

Why you shouldn't read this book: You're absolutely dragging your ex to hell with you if at all possible.  

A Piece of Cake

Written by: Jill Murphy

First line: "I'm fat," said Mrs. Large. 

Why you should read this book: An elephant mom decides that the entire family needs to engage in healthy living: no more treats, no more sitting around watching TV, just health food and jogging. Nobody enjoys it, nobody loses weight, and everyone is miserable. Then, Granny mails the family a beautiful cake, and a time of reckoning arrives.

Why you shouldn't read this book: If you have an eating disorder this might be kind of triggering. 

The Door in the Wall

Written by: Marguerite de Angeli

First line: Robin drew the coverlet about his head and turned his face to the wall.

Why you should read this book: With his father off to war and his mother waiting on the Queen, Robin is supposed to begin his training to become a knight, but his parents didn't make plans for Robin to become so sick he lost the use of his legs, and for every servant left to care for him to die of the plague. Brother Luke, a monk who is aware of Robin's situation (and that his father has generously donated to the monk's church) comes to rescue him, not just from starving to death in his own bed, but from his sense that disability means he can do nothing and has nothing to look forward to. With the help of the Brothers, Robin soon learns to swim, read, whittle, and eventually, to walk with crutches, so that eventually he has the confidence and ability to outwit an invading army and save England.

Why you shouldn't read this book: It's a bit of a quiet book, although there is a bit of action here and there. I seem to recall my mother trying to force me to read this book 40-odd years ago and me being so bored I didn't get through the first chapter. 

Fear of Flying

Written by: Erica Jong

First line: There were 117 psychoanalysts on the Pan Am flight to Vienna and I'd been treated by at least six of them. 

Why you should read this book: A woman whose neuroticism is only overshadowed by her horniness openly cheats on her husband while recounting pretty much every single thought she's ever had about sex and perseverating about every single sexual encounter she's ever experienced. This book was considered pretty groundbreaking when it was published in 1973: a female protagonist who speaks bluntly about intercourse, her desire for it, her experience of it, her disappointment in it, and so on, plus it coined the term "zipless fuck." The plot is pretty bare bones--she goes to a conference of psychoanalysts in Vienna with her husband, immediately enters into an affair with a psychoanalyst who is not her husband, and drives around with her lover (who isn't even good at sex, or anything else as far as the story tell us), thinking about guys she's had sex with and all the things that are probably wrong with her family, with some occasional thoughts about her career as a poet and what her own problem might be. 

Why you should read this book: While it actually contains a few kernels of surprising wisdom, the writing generally feels schizophrenic and practically nothing actually happens except, I guess, the 29-year-old protagonist grows up a little bit while deciding whether to pursue a second divorce. 

The New Girl

Written by: Cassandra Calin

First line: Bucharest Henri Coanda International Airport Otopeni, Romania

Why you should read this book: Leaving her grandparents and all her friends behind in Romania to start a new life in Montreal when she doesn't even speak French is hard enough, but Lia hasn't even gotten on the plane when nature throws another wrench in her plans: Lia gets her first period in the airport, and seems destined for monthly debilitation. Even though she's in a special language class where nobody else speaks French either, Lia feels lost, lonely, and increasingly frustrated with her inability to communicate with the people around her, along with her regular menstrual difficulties, which are also impacting her social life. But, in time, she does learn French, and she does make really good friends, and she does find ways to make her monthly flow less incredibly traumatic. 

Why you shouldn't read this book: If you're the kind of person who flips out at the very thought of menstruation, be aware that Lia just keeps getting her period throughout the book. 

Cry for Me, Argentina: My Life as a Failed Child Star

Written by: Tamara Yajia

First line: I was born in Buenos Aires, Argentina.

Why you should read this book: This is the type of wickedly funny writing where you feel bad that you can't stop laughing about the insane, unsavory, and sometimes abusive events of the author's recollections, but you still can't stop laughing at them. Young Yajia gets a taste of the spotlight after her wildly successful debut stripping in front of her religious school to Madonna's "Like a Prayer" and pursues it with a passion, almost tasting stardom, until her parents abruptly yank her away from her goals to live in America. She is honest about her family's foibles, her own failures, her sexuality, her struggle with addiction, and a hundred other weird personal details (like the time a cop accused her of soliciting but she countered that the gentleman fingering her in a parked car was, in fact, her own cousin, and then she paid the cop to leave her alone; or all the times her whole family--three generations, led by her grandmother--drove around the red light district to admire how beautiful all the sex workers were) that seem too crazy to be true, but they're marketing this book as a nonfiction memoir so....

Why you should read this book: If you are easily offended, especially by sex, and very particularly if you were easily offended by the end of the film Little Miss Sunshine, definitely this is not the book for you. 

Never Alone: A Solo Arctic Survival Journey

Written by: Woniya Dawn Thibeault

First line: I heave a deep sigh and watch the water vapor from my breath--a small white cloud against the backdrop of heavy, dark clouds--float out across the ice.

Why you should read this book: I rarely watch reality TV and certainly had never even heard of the show Alone, but I was fascinated by the physical and emotional journey that Woniya takes in her pursuit of living her dream of pitting herself against the elements and thriving in the face of adversity. Dropped by helicopter north of the Arctic Circle in September and carrying only some homemade clothes, a brick of pemmican, and ten survival objects, she rejoices in the freedom and possibilities of her frigid endeavor, enduring bitter cold and near starvation, but never giving up her sense of joy and delight. She nearly starves to death, but she never stops dancing, she never stops loving nature, and she never gives up on herself. 

Why you shouldn't read this book: The producers really did these contestants dirty; if they had dropped her off north of the Arctic Circle in April and let her take fifteen survival items instead of forcing her carry a ton of camera equipment and film everything she did from three angles, this lady would have been able to survive indefinitely.